The Economy, The Election: We Have A Problem

OK. So. Here we go.

We grew up listening to our grandmother's stories of the Depression era (She was born in 1920.) and World War II era, when she was constantly sick because she was anemic and iron-rich proteins were rationed. We don't want to be alarmist, but are people LISTENING out there? To their grandparents? To the news (which is actually covering NEWS these days!! How serious is it when there's more than shootings and informercial product testing on the local news, huh?).

Here's a recent rundown if you're not listening:

1. Financial institutions are dropping out of the market like roaches after bringing Raid pellets back home to their babies. This means: Despite what people on TV are saying (It's called 'damage control.'), our money is NOT safe. We owe massive debt to China and other countries, Russia absolutely HATES us right now, to say nothing of the Middle East region. And I'm not being xenophobic: we all know this country has been pushing its luck and ignoring foreign relations for the past eight years. This is what happens. Are you scared? You should be.

2. Smokescreen politics. Seriously, let's deal with this NOW. Sarah Palin is not qualified to be vice president or president, if that time comes. Her interview with Charles Gibson made it clear that she doesn't know the answers to the questions, or even the background material. She was giving the 'right' answer. I don't have a problem with religious people, but a country cannot be run by faith. It can be run into the ground by it, though. If you don't believe us, just look to George Bush.

3. This whole thing about delaying the campaign until this economic crisis is resolved? (See video below.) What the fuck. No. McCain has been running for almost a YEAR now while serving as senator. Obama (second video) is correct (and negligent, just like McCain and any other senator who bails out on Congress to run for president): they've gone this far; now we need to know who is smart enough to start to turn things around.





4. George Bush warns us that we're facing 'a long and painful recession.' Really? Didn't he deny a recession just a few weeks ago? This was NOT hard to predict. Listen to Suze Orman, not George Bush. Dear Mr. Bush: Shut the fuck up. Seriously. Leave. Get out of the White House. Go back to Texas or leave the country. We're not just being angry. It must be miserable being George Bush, who has always seemed so sure of himself and his motivations, and now everything is falling apart. He has seriously run a legendary country into the ground, with the help of an administration of greedy yes-men.



We are mad. Burning up. This country has a fever right now. Is it going to perish? We get fever chills writing this, but yes, it is going to succumb to this sickness if we don't wake the hell up and throw out the assholes who are fucking up our country today. This isn't a diatribe in support of Barack Obama. It's desperation. Call Congress, send them emails and faxes, and tell them you are freaked out and want this shit managed properly TODAY, not tomorrow, not in November after the election, and not in February after the new president comes in.

Are you ready to lose all your money, your national identity, and possibly your life to the gluttony of a few fuckups in Washington, D.C.? No, really, ask yourself that right now. Are you? DO SOMETHING.

Republican Hypocrisy: Watch Rove Et. Al Flip-Flop (Video)

We don't normally get all political because we're really sick of all politics, being from D.C. and all. Republicans think Democrats are always wrong. Democrats think Republicans are always wrong. We don't know how many members of either party ever actually listen to the other--or even their own--candidates.

But listen to this video. This is a great clip from the Jon Stewart show that shows politics (in this case Republican) being "played." It's pure hypocrisy: Say what you want people to think, and the people who like your color better will believe you. It's creepy. It's awful.



Not even funny. Just. Gross.

Who is Fit to Lead? - Obama or McCain?

Men's Fitness is running a feature on the lifestyle habits of John McCain and Barack Obama. We know one is probably older than some of the sequoias in the redwood forest and the other is a spring chicken, but how they live might affect their health even more...read on to learn about the habits of your next president, whoever he might be (Barack Obama).

John McCain - Republican (Age: 71)

The decorated war veteran has undergone surgery to treat an enlarged prostate and two rounds of skin cancer. He has a bum knee and limited range of motion in his arms, caused by years of torture as a POW in Vietnam. He also smoked until he was 45 and doesn't often hit the gym. But McCain consistently gets a clean bill of health on his frequent medical checkups, and he regularly hikes near his Arizona home. In 2006, he and his son hiked the Grand Canyon from rim to rim. In the Senate, he was another sponsor (along with Edwards and Kennedy) of the Patients' Bill of Rights. In the past, he was an advocate of giving more decision-making power to your doctor, rather than your hmo.

Barack Obama - Democrat (Age: 46)

Obama has the build of a basketball player, which he was. His high school team even won the Hawaii state championship during his senior year (check out his moves on YouTube). These days, he still plays occasionally and hits the gym regularly. On top of kicking his own cigarette habit, he's introduced several health-related bills. His National Medic Act aims to improve patient safety and alert patients sooner about medical mistakes. He's also addressed environmental health concerns and introduced the Healthy Places Act, which supports improvements on parks, trails, and public transportation. His proposed health-care plan is similar to the universal health-care plan Hillary Clinton proposed and emphasizes coverage for preventive services.

Vote on Who is Fit to Lead @ Men's Fitness

Click above for the dietary and exercise habits of McCain and Obama.

Missouri Politician Worked In Gay Porn

Missouri House candidate Michael J. Colona admits that he has done work in the gay porn industry.

Not that there's anything wrong with that!

Here's the story, if you care.

Haggard's Whore Speaks Out

Mike Jones, the Rev. Ted Haggard's personal Hoover, gave some creepy details in a new interview with Nerve. Among them:

Nerve: But when he was actually with you, he was like a giddy schoolboy. Do you think he was falling in love with you?

Jones: He always had this huge smile, and he was always asking me questions about sex, and I would tell him something and he would go, "Really? Really?" He wanted me to talk so much about gay sex, it was almost like he was living through me. Could I see Ted Haggard being infatuated with me or having feelings for me? Yes, I could see that happening.

Nerve: When he watched you and [your friend] Matt have sex in front of him, do you think that was sort of an educational thing for him, or was he just getting off on it?

Jones: He was really getting off on it. He was very much a voyeur. I think that watching that and not actually getting involved was a safe place for him.

To learn more about how to screw a self-loathing hypocrite, click here.