Chace Crawford Shirtless In Gossip Girl Premiere

What else is there to say?

Exhibits Chace and Zac

These photos from this week's Teen Choice Awards are evidence of our ongoing class action case: We present exhibits C and Z:




The verdict: Zac Efron may work harder at his body, but with his [fake] long eyelashes, [fake] tan, [made up] perfect skin, [veneered] teeth, [MAC-provided] blushed cheeks, [Shiseido] red lips, and carefully flat-ironed hair, Zac is basically a Real Houseboy of Orange (Skin) County, while Chace is a mostly natural beauty.

It's like a before-and-after Stepford makeover!

A.C. Slater Is People's Sexiest Bachelor!

Wow. Zack Morris must be soooooo jealous!!!

Other alleged sexies include:

Brody Jenner (gross, but OK)
David Cook (yes, that David Cook...the one from American Idol)
Terrence Howard (OK)
Bryan Spears (Britney's older brother--what the fug?!)
Gerard Butler (OK)
James Blake (He's hot, but who the hell is he??)
Bret Michaels (What plastic surgeon paid off PEOPLE for this placement??!)
Andy Samberg (If you're into that kind of thing)
Akiva Schaffer (???)
Hunter Johansson (Scarlet's twin brother...OK, we'll totally do a boy version of ScarJo.)
Adam Levine (Cute with a side of asshole.)
Penn Badgley, Chace Crawford, Ed Westwick (Tag Team!!!)

What the hell is PEOPLE thinking?! Seriously. Britney Spears's effing brother? We didn't even know Britney HAD a brother until today.

Our list:

1. Chace Crawford

2. A.C. Slater-as-Rambo

3. Penn Badgley with Girl Hair

4. The Beast With Two Backs made of Chace Crawford and J.C. Chasez

5. Anderson Cooper (we know he's seeing a hot guy, but he's single till he comes out and admits it!)

6. Chad Michael Murray (Is he single? Do we care? His nipples are big enough for her AND us!)

7. Benjamin Bradley (pictured below w/...)

7. Ethan Reynolds

9. Jack Mackenroth

10. (M)Ann Coulter (Allegedly!)

Chace Crawford Suck Pic (No Kiddin'!)

All in good fun, this is just a little something he learned under the tutorship of "bud" J.C. Chasez.

Chace Crawford Is Pretty In GQ

What else is new?

He gets even better without his shirt.

Here's a little video montage some chronic masturbator with Windows Movie Maker compiled.

US: Chace Crawford & Penn Badgley: Then and Now

US Weekly's Web site has a little slideshow featuring Gossip Girl stars then and now. It's amazing what a stylist and a few years can do for sex appeal.

And if you think years took away from these guys' sex appeal...well, we think you're gross!

Head on over to US to see the girls then and now.

Chace Crawford: WiiWii!

Impossibly cute Chace Crawford at a Nintendo Wii release party yesterday!

J.C. Chasez: "We're both straight!"

I'm not gay. I'm just fancy!



Dude, you're so not gay. We're so not gay! Dude!



I'm comfortable enough with my masculinity to wear pink satin.
And makeup.
I'm just fancy!



Dude! Check out the football! Would a GAY carry a football?

I
don't
think
so!



I'm not gay either.



They're all straight!

Straight to the butt!

Here's what J.C. said today on Kiss FM about the "J.C. Sha-say! and Chase Crawford Are Dating!" rumors:

“For the record, we’re both straight. We’re not dating.”

“Let’s clear that up real quickly and the thing is, we don’t even get to hang out that much. We are friends, absolutely, the guy is a super nice guy and he’s a friend of mine but you know the only time people would usually see us together is in some type of photograph so they just assume that it’s like that. You know people hang out with their best friends every day… and I don’t even see this guy every day. He’s a friend of mine, like I said, it’s just ridiculous. The fact of the matter is, if I’m standing next to a girl and I don’t have a girlfriend all the sudden I’m dating her. If I’m dating a girl and I’m standing next to another girl I’m having an affair, so now since there hasn’t been any of that smoke out there in a minute now if I’m hanging out with a guy they’re going to make up a rumor, it’s just stupid now.”

He stands next to that girl Chace a lot lately, doesn't he? And still they're not together enough to make him happy! Awww!

But they're NOT gay!

Chace Crawford and J.C. Chasez: The New Lance and Reichen?

Above: Always heavily-styled J.C. Sha-say! and Gossip Girl Pretty Chace Crawford hanging out three separate times. BFFs? BFs? All we know is, the gossip boys of the Internet are going at it like mad over this one.

It's a little creepy, though, no? Sha-say! is like, what, at least a decade older that Chace, if not two.

Oh well. Call him a "mentor." That's what they did in Ancient Greece.

Chace Crawford's Sad Beauty

Gossip Girl's gorgeous Chace Crawford was spied looking beautiful but a little sad at LAX yesterday...could it be the rumors about his alleged pink love triangle with American Idol Carrie Underwood and NSync-er J.C. Chasez?? More at Faded Youth.